Vita's Testimony

MY TESTIMONY


Everybody knows that children can be very annoying and irritating especially when adults try do talk about serious things such as politics, economy, business, and especially theology. We tend to neglect children when it comes to theology questions. We wait until they will grow up and then they will be taught about God and how to live according to His Word. Doing so, we make the same mistake as disciples did when they opposed children to come to Jesus. It is hard for us to believe in child conversion or answers to their prayers. Maybe I would also tend to think the same, except for God heard my prayer when I was about ten and that has changed not only my life but my whole family.

I was born and grew up in Orthodox family. My parents went to church every Easter and sometimes on Christmas Eve. On Easter morning my Mom and two older kids (usually my brother and I) would prepare a basket full with eggs, cookies, Easter bread, and some vegetables, to take it to the morning service to have it blessed. My dad was a good “Christian” because he would not smoke until he had a bite of “holy” food. But when the afternoon came, “who cares about religion,” he liked to say, “it is the time to be happy, because Christ has risen”. Gallons of vodka, wine, and different kinds of alcohol were necessary to celebrate such an occasion. When someone asked my father if he was a Christian, he named all bad things that he had never done, and that was his evidence of being a Christian. Yet he knew nothing about being a real Christian.

My brother and I had never been sent to Sunday school but I cannot count how many times we had to walk to a store to buy another bottle of vodka or cigarettes. Many times we asked my mom to bring some candies but cigarettes were first on the shopping list.

I still can hear my parents yelling at each other; my mom telling him that she will leave and never come back again if he will not quit. I was only 8 years old I would run away from home because of fights in the house. I hated to live in that home. “Nobody even careed if I am dead or alive,” I told to myself many times. When I was 9 years old, I began to steal. First it was just candies from my grandma. Then I began to steal toys from the neighbor children. Before long, all the neighbors would watch me when I came around their homes because I could steal from them anything I wanted. My family did not have any money because my father used all the money to purchase alcohol. But I wanted to be like other kids: I wanted to go on vacations, to have new cloths, to play and laugh together with my family. I wanted to have a normal family. I dreamed to see my parents together, holding hands and smiling at each other but at that time it was just a dream; as a result I tried to make myself as happy as I could.

When I was nine years of age, I had to take care of my younger brother and two sisters when my mother was gone for work. Sometimes she was gone for a few days or even a whole week. Since my dad did not care about work around the house and farm, I did not have any other choice but to work to the best of my abilities. Two cows, a few pigs, lots of chickens needed to be fed regularly as well as taking care of my brother and sisters. At nights, when my father returned back home I had to be very careful what to say or how to ask; otherwise the meal that I tried to prepare so hard would be thrown on the floor.

We were so terribly poor that we lived with my grandma in one small house. We had only one room for 5 people. There was not any hope for something better because all money that my mother made was barely enough for food. I remember my mom begging my dad to quit drinking and smoking but it seemed to be pointless.

One night my father came home very drunk. They started a big fight. I could not stand it any more so I decided to leave my home. As I left I thought that I would never come back again. There was no reason for me to want to come back. I felt unloved and unwanted there.

It was dark. Cool spring breeze genteelly touched my wet cheeks as I was running up and down the hills. Many different thoughts circled in my head. I could not understand why all these bad things were happing to me. It seemed that there was no reason for my existence. Nobody even cared how I felt or what I thought. My dreams and my desires did not matter a bit to anybody else. I asked myself why I was even alive, for what reason? Then, suddenly, I remembered the words my neighbor lady said to me one time. She said, "Vita, Jesus loves you. He died for you." I thought, "It does not make any sense. How could God love me when my life is so bad?" At that moment I looked up to heaven and suddenly felt warm touch which I will never be able to explain. My heart started to bit faster and faster but deep inside I felt indescribable peace and joy. I was only a little girl and I didn't know what I was supposed to do. But Holy Spirit gave me the right words that I needed to pray to God. I kneeled down and whispered very quietly, "God if You really exist, would You please, help my family?" It was the first time I had ever prayed a real prayer. I did not want to live like I had been living before. I suddenly realized how many sins I had committed. I asked Him to forgive me. Wonderful joy filled my soul. I knew I was no longer the same. I returned back home and waited for the answer.

It was spring. Everything around testified about new life. Trees, flowers, birds seemed to be ready for gorgeous summer; only in my family there was no joy or sign of any changes. Everything was the same, dead and gloomy. I almost started to loose my hope. But somewhere deep within I strongly believed in God’s promise. I understood that it might take some time before it happened, so I patiently waited for the miracle.

One day when I arrived home from school I saw my mother and sisters talking about something. They seemed to be excited and were talking very quietly. I could not figure out what was happening, but when I asked them, my sister gave me a big hug and said that my father had not smoked all day. He had not been drinking all day long either. As soon as they told me the news, I heard a voice behind me saying, “This is the beginning”. I knew immediately Who that was and what beginning He was talking about because I was waiting for this moment for a long time. God started working in my family. It was the beginning of all great things He had planned for me and my family.

It took some time before both of my parents were ready to give their hearts to Jesus. But I remember as clear as today, the day when my dad and my mom both kneeled at the altar and let Jesus change their hearts forever. It was on Easter eve. They went to revival service and the Lord spoke directly to their hearts and saved them. I cannot explain the joy that filled my heart. Only tears were expression of the inner state. No words were suitable for the occasion. It was the happiest, the biggest and the most memorable day in my life. Nothing could be the same anymore. The Lord fulfilled His promise and nobody could change it.

As spring brings new life to the nature around us so the Lord gave a new beginning to my family. In a short time my father found a job and made enough money to pay all debts we had, and very soon he was able to start building us a new house. That was a miracle because he made more money for the first two years after his conversion than he had made in his whole life before. The Lord has changed not only the life style of our family but also the atmosphere and the attitude. Instead of seeing my mom and dad fighting, now I see them hugging, holding hands, and smiling at each other. The hearts that had been occupied with anger and frustration now are filled with love and peace. Instead of spending all money on vodka and cigarettes, now my father brings candies for the kids and flowers for his happy wife. We, children used to be afraid of daddy coming home but now we wait impatiently for him to come.

It is hard to explain what has happened with my family but one thing I can surely say. The Lord answered my simple child’s prayer.